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Why making friends is easy but finding a partner difficult?

One of the most lovely and incredible experiences you will ever feel in your entire life is falling in love. It’s a truly magical experience, and it’s not strange that innumerable songs, poems, and well-known works of literature have attempted to describe the joy and excitement of being madly in love. In fact, it frequently seems as though falling in love is the center of the universe. But even with online dating literally at our fingertips, it’s not always as simple as they make it out to be in the movies. There are times when it seems like the more effort you put forward, the further away you are from making a meaningful connection, and you find yourself wondering, “Why can’t I find love?”

Reasons you can’t find love?

Your beliefs and conditioning about love play a major role in not being able to find love. Let’s look at a few of those:

The idea of a Perfect Partner

Finding a compatible spouse can be challenging, particularly if you already have an ideal partner in mind. Since everyone has flaws, it will be challenging for others to live up to their standards. Even if you do discover someone who meets your standards, your potential partner can determine that you fall short of theirs. The quest for the ideal spouse then starts all over again.

Lust versus love

Real love, however, never materialized because it never existed in the first place. Do not mix up love and lust. Love is having a great deal of affection for someone and wanting to be with them frequently. Lust rarely lasts for very long and frequently makes people feel exploited and empty. People who frequently find themselves in this kind of relationship can think that true love is extremely difficult to come by.

You’re too cautious

Between being discerning and being too picky, there is a considerable difference. Discerning dater makes love-related choices that are in their best interests without compromising their ideals and principles. When someone is too choosy, they frequently date only those people who match their ideal definition of a spouse because they are acting out of fear. They do this out of self-preservation, eliminating a tonne of feasible options.

You’ve Experienced Pain Before

It’s possible that you’re so frightened of being wounded emotionally that you don’t want to put yourself out there at all, whether you suffered through a painful breakup or were disappointed by a crush. Fear of abandonment, which can cause one to resist the very thing they desire: a profound, emotional connection with another person, is a major factor in why people are frightened to open themselves to others. And if you can’t be open to being vulnerable, you eliminate the chance of having an intimate relationship.

 You’re hesitant to commit

Fear of commitment is the most frequent factor in why falling in love is so difficult. Some people find labels unsettling, while for others, the unpredictability of the relationship’s status is equally terrifying. It’s likely that you’re avoiding commitment altogether because you’re hesitant to commit to someone, be it hesitation to start an unofficial relationship or to make things formal.

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You’re not ready to engage in anything

Even though you might enjoy the thought of falling in love, relationships take a lot of work and time to maintain. If you constantly want to leave as things get serious, you probably fall into the category of folks who aren’t necessarily willing to put in the effort. It might only be a phase, you might prefer polyamorous relationships, or you might just want to test the waters. You’re not prepared to love just one person, for whatever reason. Making things permanent is tough for people who do not want to settle down or who are apprehensive about doing so in general; this may be why you have trouble finding a lasting relationship.

Relationship Expectations

What expectations do you have when you start a relationship? Do you enter every relationship with the expectation that it would endure forever, or do you prefer to let things unfold gradually over time? Rushing into an intimate relationship could turn your partner off, whereas letting them get to know you first might result in a more enduring connection.

Ex – Lover’s Dilemma

It’s impossible to offer someone your heart when it already belongs to someone else. No matter how many dates you go on, it will be difficult to connect with another person if you are constantly mourning your ex or yearning for that impossible crush. You may need to let go of the person who is taking up all of your emotional energy in order to discover and rediscover love.

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If you are struggling to find love, it could be why you just looked at it. Identifying and being mindful of which reasons hamper your chances can be an excellent way to change your belief system. Change it to see if it changes your relationship status.

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