15 Most Common Relationship Problems and Solutions
If you have been in a relationship, then you might have experienced the ‘honeymoon phase.’ It’s when everything Is going great. You feel as though nothing could ever go wrong. And it doesn’t! Both, you and your partner are head over heels in love with each other. Even when things don’t go according to what was initially planned, you’re still able to find the good in everything.
However, the real test of durability begins when this honeymoon phase starts fading out and both of you are out of it! It’s like a slipping sand. You don’t want it to go away, but the tighter you hold on to it, it slips away. Things go south even with minor inconveniences. That’s when it all seems difficult. At this point of time, getting out of the relationship under the pretext of maintaining your own peace seems a viable option than staying together and figuring it out.
Don’t get me wrong. Of course, I don’t mean that you should continue staying in a toxic or abusive place. These are the exceptions when obviously, moving away from toxicity is the best thing to do.
If you are reading this right now, then you probably might have googled ‘relationship advice online’. Having said there, there are some common relationship problems that every couple encounters.
Let’s look at 15 of such common relationship problems.
- Lack of Communication: Misunderstandings, arguments, and dissatisfaction result from poor communication. It also causes couples to feel unheard and invalidated, which may swiftly escalate to resentment and other problems.
- Trust issues: Insecurity, jealousy and lack of trust, all fall under the same spectrum. It’s not possible to not have these problems but having them too often indicate a problematic sign.
- Monetary matters: This is a quick source of problems. Is one of you always paying the bills or overspending? This can be stressful and maybe even burdensome for the other one.
- Unclear and unrealistic expectations: You might expect your partner to read your mind, know what’s going on without saying or even pamper you or be fair at all times. Having expectations set over the rooftop are unrealistic.
- Lack of support: Just because you might have the solutions to everything doesn’t mean you should undermine your partner in their lows. Are you being supportive by sticking by their side or just boasting about how they are failing?
- No boundaries: Being in a relationship doesn’t give you the right to check your partners phone without them knowing or barging into places uninvited. They had a life before you and having that intact is important. Setting boundaries is required to be in a healthy, long-lasting relationship.
- Stagnation and boredom: Do you feel as if there’s nothing exciting left or nothing new to share? You might have stagnated in the relationship. It’s time to reflect and check what’s going wrong. Because, either fun or routine, there is always something to talk in a relationship. You just need to check if your perspective is wrong.
- Wrong response: Are you responding to your partners anger with anger? One of the most common problems. When both the partners are angry, no one is thinking objectively. Anger is taking up the space, making the brain think in irrational ways, detrimental to the relationship. Having said that, logic needs to be dealt with logic, and emotions with emotions. Dealing emotions with logic is a great misfit.
- Infidelity: Being attracted to other people is natural. But knowing when and where to stop is necessary. Going with the flow, keeping your partner in the dark and cheating on them whether emotionally or physically, is unfair to the relationship.
- Evolving priorities: As you grow, together in the relationship, you are bound to have different priorities. Not necessarily will you be able to give your partner the same amount of time. But completely changing priorities and keeping your partner last is problematic.
- Lack of appreciation: After the initial phase, there is a lack of appreciations. It feels like there is no love left between the two of you. This indicates that you are taking your partner for granted.
- Different love languages: Among the five love languages (words of affirmation, acts of service, receiving gifts, quality time, and physical touch), you and your partner seem to be using different ones. Probably, gifts make you happy but showing love through words of appreciation is what makes your partner happy. In this case, communicating and coming to a common ground, maybe halfway, is something that you might find beneficial.
- Lack of efforts: You’re at your best behavior in the initial phase while wooing the other person but once you’re assured that person is not going away, you stop chasing the person and doing the little things to make them happy and keep the spark alive. Although not possible always, completely stopping to do so is unfair and one of the leading problems between couples.
- Competitive and controlling nature: Most of the times, you know you’re wrong or probably extending the fight too much. But apologizing is not something that comes to you naturally. Winning that fight seems so important because you might be competitive and would want to feel in control of everything. Only to satisfy your ego, you keep on fighting. Again, a major problem where you let the ego win at the cost of your relationship.
- Intimacy issues: With the age of everything turning into online mode, it’s extremely crucial to spend some time with your partner in person. Talking openly about intimacy is important to set both the partners in a comfort zone of the relationship without crossing a boundary.
Some people, with time, learn to get over these issues, whereas a few, split apart. Then you might wonder whether having fights is a bad sign? No. In fact, a healthy relationship is bound to have fights! Not knowing a way to resolve these fights is a bad sign, the real problem! The good news is, this can be addressed and changed, leading you to a satisfied relationship.
How to solve relationship problems?
Look at the bright side!
No one is perfect. Everyone has some or the other flaws. Despite everything, you got in a relationship with that person because you could see the good side. Even though sometimes the flaws unfold quite later, they still come out because the other person eventually feels comfortable sharing their goofy side. When problems start to surface, it’s often difficult to remind yourself of that good side, but, very important to do so in order to save the relationship.
Communication is the key!
Majority of the air is cleared when there is clear communication between two individuals. The two people in the relationship best know the situations around which the fight had stemmed. Hence, to most of the problems in a relationship, communication is really a key. In certain situations, mediation by a third person who’s neutral would also help smoothen the communication.
Don’t let the ego win!
People take offence in having to be the wrong person and apologizing hurts the ego. However, know that if your partner really matters to you, there’s nothing wrong in saying sorry. If only, if can quickly make you and your partner realize that most of the argument was not even rational or valid. Breakup is not the solution to every problem. It’s just deviating you from the actual problem. Not concluding to a breakup right away will help you focus on what needs to be addressed instead of revolving around the bushes.
Secret to a successful relationship? Treat your partner as if you are trying to woo them, even after 2 months, 2 years or even 20!
It is important to spend time and efforts in the initial phase of the relationship. But doing so after the honeymoon phase fades, is even more important. To avoid stagnation and boredom, complementing your partner or ordering that pizza or doing little things to make their day better is important in a relationship. In short, giving timely doses of appreciations and assurances are necessary.
Evolve with the relationship!
Using the same methods that you used earlier might not necessarily work now. Stay inquisitive. Keep learning new things about your partner. Observe what makes them happy with changing times and try doing what’s in your power to be a part of it, either actively or as a catalyst.
On an end note: Problems are inevitable because two people can never be the same or agree upon everything. It is unrealistic and inhumane. However, what matters is how much you are willing to stay together despite the differences and how you are able to get past these difficult times, together!
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